I was listless, a sense of defeat settling over me as I lay in the hospital bed. There comes a point where you lose all hope, all will to live. A lot happened over the next few days—headlines about Chen Xing, Lu Xinran being officially welcomed into her family, Shen Yu returning to Jiangcheng to expand his business—but I paid none of it any mind. I spent a quiet week in the hospital. By my count,